Tool Talk

General Category => General Discussion => Daily Howdy => Topic started by: Nolatoolguy on December 13, 2013, 07:41:19 AM

Title: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on December 13, 2013, 07:41:19 AM
Hey guys

I've been struggling with my grandma in the hospital. About three monthes ago she fell and broke her hip. She has been home with a caregiver for a month. The other day she had a severe stroke. Currently she doesn't remember who I or anyone else is. They say her memory may come back with time but there not sure.

To make matters worse my aunt and uncle are fighting over the will and who should get what. I mean she's still alive an there arguing about who gets what. My uncle started taking stuff from her room at my aunts house. So then my other aunt got the police involved and it's just a mess.

Since we moved from Louisana we have been renting my grandmas house. It was sitting empty as it was to big for her but she didn't want to sell it yet. We moved in, and pay enough rent to her to cover taxes. we keep it maintained and everything. We know it's best if we move out soon. That's just a stress in itself.

I love my family but sometimes i just don't get it. I mean my grandmas struggling and there there just argueing and making stuff worse.

I guess it doesn't help either my little ford bit the dust the other day. Ime borrowing one of my cousins work trucks but I can't keep it forever. That's just a material thing an not the biggest of issues but it's still a little stressful trying to get a car or truck with the little money we do have.

I know everything will work out one way or another an what happens is ment to happen but it's just sort of hard right now.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Papaw on December 13, 2013, 07:50:20 AM
Vent here any time, Neil. Sometimes it  is the only therapy you can get. Things will work out- you have a strong family with your mother and father.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: OilyRascal on December 13, 2013, 11:29:12 AM
Hang in there, Neil.  Try not to let this affect the quality of the time you spend with your grandmother.  As you've said, it will work out.

PS:  Please don't think for a moment you have the only family with contention/dysfunction that surfaces.  I could share horror stories :)
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Lostmind on December 13, 2013, 12:04:56 PM
The worst in people seems to surface at the worst times. A lot of us have been through similar times,
seems to work out somehow. Someone needs to watch out for your grandmothers wishes .
Do your best so her memories are good ones.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on December 13, 2013, 12:44:52 PM
Thanks guys. It helps to hear what your saying.

Papaw is definitely correct. I have a strong family with my parents. I couldn't ask for better parents.

I have a lot in life and by no means is my life horrible. It is just challenging lately. As everyone said thoe, ile get through it and things will be ok.



Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: bird on December 13, 2013, 01:37:59 PM
Thanks guys. It helps to hear what your saying.

Papaw is definitely correct. I have a strong family with my parents. I couldn't ask for better parents.

I have a lot in life and by no means is my life horrible. It is just challenging lately. As everyone said thoe, ile get through it and things will be ok.

I've never understood families that "bicker over wills/ stuff/ ect."  Unfortunately, I think it happens to a lot of families. Oh, and losing your car makes EVERYTHING more difficult!!!!  It's not material...  just the truth. How old is your grandmother...  has she been in decling health? Are you in a position (for better or worse) to be a sort of "mediator"  within your family? Have you told them, "I can't believe you are arguing over this stuff.....  is that what's the most important thing to you?" Sometimes speaking your mind and being brutally honest helps....  of course, depending on your family, it could get you shot!!!!! (haha.....  i think)
        OF COURSE you are supposed to vent on this site!  If we weren't allowed to, I'd a been kicked out this forum years ago! We are a strange type of family on this site....  at least I feel that way.  I have to admit,  I would never have thought I'd have such good friends that I've "met" via the internet.  It still sounds really weird when I say to someone,  "Oh, so and so isn't doing well." 
      "Who is so and so"
      "Oh, it's one of my wrench buddies."
We're a motley group!
cheers,
bird.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: tucker on December 13, 2013, 01:49:40 PM
its true what they say neil,you can choose your friends but not your relatives.
all the best to you and your grandma.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: johnsironsanctuary on December 13, 2013, 02:46:46 PM
Hang in there Neil. You have a whole life ahead of you. Treasure the moments that you have with your grandmother.  The stuff in the will is just stuff and not  worth stressing over.  Watch and learn.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: jimwrench on December 13, 2013, 08:32:55 PM
Stay strong;this too shall pass. Don't understand people and how they can do this type of thing during a time that is hard anyway. You don't want to be a doormat and at the same time you don't want to be obnoxious. Try to stay strong and civil.
There will be a reward even if its only in your own peace of mind.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Branson on December 14, 2013, 06:54:47 AM
I don't understand why this happens in families any more than bird does.    It's a mystery to me, but I've seen it all too often.   But I have good hope for you -- you have proven that your values and ethics are of the finest, and these will stand by you, and your parents through this mess.   Fussing about material things won't make the aunt and uncle happy people.  In fact, their shenanigans  at this time tells me they're an unhappy couple already.  What's that quote about knowing the price of everything and the value of nothing?  Not a problem you have.   

Your other family here hopes for the best for your grandmother and for you and your parents.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on December 14, 2013, 12:01:08 PM
Thanks guys. You really help.

Personally to me I think stuff is great but it's just stuff. Expecially helping with the tornadoes I've learned its just stuff. Moments an memories are what matter in my oppoion.

I have some tools from my grandpa. To me I don't care if I get anything farther with monatery value, I have memories witch are free.

She is 84 and has lived a relatively good life up until the past few monthes. She has obvisoly been having a few problems naturally with age but nothing unexpected.

Its tough for me to say she is now very combative to the hospital staff an most people in the room. She now thinks my father is her husband. Her husband my grandpa passed backed in 2002. She is good to him but other then that she's horrible. They had to give her some drugs to calm her down.

The hospital has been great in dealing with her. I trually am impressed with the hospital.

I do however have some good news! I just got the results of my final for collage last night. I have passed the welding class with a 93%. I could have been 7%better, but 93 isn't to bad.

My cousin has been good with letting me keep his company pickup truck for personal use. Ime paying for the fuel but I feel bad putting miles and stuff on. He sais its more then fine but I don't like to rely on other peoples stuff. I put a add on craigslist for my f150 as non running parts only. If I can get just a little money for it ile be happy. I got a few emails and someone's coming to look at it tonight.




Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Chillylulu on December 20, 2013, 04:09:39 AM
I think sometimes it isn't about the stuff. It could be your Aunt and Uncle are doing the only thing they could think of to hold on.  We're weird when we are stressed, we don't think right. Your relatives could have had a whole lot of time together growing up together, I assume. They could be reverting to behavior that started before you were born.
I think the best we can do is to be kind to everyone and try to overlook all but the worst, dangerous behavior.
I know about someone who, when he lost his parents, wanted everything that had to do with them. He said it was the weirdest thing. Go figure.
Concerning your grandmother, our body's chemistry is really complex. Remember how she has always usually been, that's her. You can laugh about this stuff. You have to, or else all you can do is cry.

Congratulations on passing your test. Welding is a skill that will serve you your whole life. I've always wanted to weld beautifully, but I never took the time to gain the skillset. Good for you.

I hope you and your family will be blessed with peace, and a new to you truck.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: mikeswrenches on December 20, 2013, 07:50:26 AM
I do however have some good news! I just got the results of my final for collage last night. I have passed the welding class with a 93%. I could have been 7%better, but 93 isn't to bad.

Congratulations!!!  You're making us all proud.  Keep up the good work.

Mike
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on December 20, 2013, 09:59:46 PM
Thanks guys.

As far as her stay in the hospital goes its been a interesting time. Currently she cant leave. Whenever they let up on the drugs she just rips all the cords out, an attempts to stand up to leave. Keep in mind she cant stand up since the hip. They cant finish the last of the tests they want to run until she is fully compliant. Without the tests they cant determine whatever they need to determine.

She will be going to a rehabilitation center an nursing home after she is taken care of there at the hospital.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on January 05, 2014, 03:53:42 PM
Ahh as time passed I have news that is bitter sweet. Currently ime about to go crazy with my uncle.

I am pleased to say she is doing better physically. We know its not gonna be a quick recovery but now shes on track. Her long term memory is slowly coming back. She can at least now recognize people. She still has beginning stages of altimers so short term memory isn't good. We know that it wont become perfect but shes getting better.

They anticipate her to be out of rehabilitation center in two weeks. That is the scheduled target date, but of course it could change.

She will obvisly need care. The family decided to have her come back to her house. We will have 24/7 in home caregiver. My brother will be moving out by the end of the week to my aunts house temporally until he finds a place of his own. We will remodel the bathroom, utility room an brothers old bedroom. Basically we will be making the room were shes gonna be bigger and turn a half bath into a full bath. While we are doing that we will widen the hallway a little for future if/when she needs a wheelchair.

Now for the crazy ever loving family part.

Let me first say there family and at the end of the day I love them.

However I really just wana go crazy today. Very long story short I come home early an hes in my shop going through my stuff. I about freaked out when I saw case to a thermal imagining camera from work open. I asked if he touched it hes like yeh an laughs. I didn't say anything else just changed the topic to lets go wait for the plumber.

I know I might be over reacting. I just hate when people go in my shop for no reason at all. I don't care if my dad goes in to get a screwdriver but even if he doesn't put it back I tend to get cranky. When it comes to other people I seriously cant stand it an it takes everything I have not to start yelling or hit him upside the head with a pipe wrench. I mean you can go through my room, I really don't care. You just don't touch anything in my shop. Some of that stuff is expensive and hard to replace. A thermal imaging camera from work well lets not begin to look at the price tag on that.

My dad is trying to play it down as in lets not make a fuss about it. I don't wana stir up anything I just want him to know not to be touching my stuff. If he needs a tool he can ask.

I now have to put up with everyone coming over to see my grandma which I know thats good. I just don't want people in my tools.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: rusty on January 05, 2014, 07:14:59 PM
There is a very old expression, locks keep honest people honest....very sad...but very true...sigh
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Branson on January 06, 2014, 06:12:37 AM
Ya know, some things you just don't do.  And a big one is you just don't go through other people's stuff.  Especially, you do not rummage through somebody's tools -- more especially the tools somebody uses to make their living.  Your uncle ought to know better.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: oldtools on January 06, 2014, 03:20:53 PM
Need to set your ground rules!!! "If you need something, please ASK me, don't just go through my stuff!!" "These tools are my livelihood, I need them to survive.. So I need to protect & control them.."
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: OilyRascal on January 06, 2014, 03:51:39 PM
I wish I had a dollar for each failed attempt by an electrician or plumber to walk up to my $800 miter saw to cut a piece of PVC with a $100 finish blade.  Constant battle.

My favorite is when one wants to put his/her drink on top of the cast iron saw table.  I've thrown a many of drink across the way.

My best to your grandmother, Neil.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on January 07, 2014, 02:22:25 AM
You guys are all ever so correct.

I have most of my tools in a small heated shop in the back of the garage. Theres cabinets on the other side of the garage as well. The rest lays in half of a two car garage. Whats in half the garage is more like mowers an material. Two antique tablesaws and a small antique planer are there as well.

A door is on the shop an theres a lock on it. Sad thing is the lock isn't matching the door frame an who knows were the key is. I want to put a hasp type lock on the door but my dads like did he steal anything?

I admit I value those tools more then there worth. I often tend to think I have ten million dollars there. Its not that much, or not even as much as some of you guys have. To me its like everything, since I was young I was buying tools. I couldn't just replace them in a single day. As others said I also rely on those tools for work and occasional small side jobs.

I love the story about the expensive saw blade. I was once lazy an figured several cuts on some composite decking wont hurt. Well that was a lesson I learned, but it was my own tool.



Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on January 12, 2014, 07:24:42 AM
Well guys yesterday was it.

My uncle went through my tools once again. We didn't argue as much as I told him to stay out my stuff. He stayed quite and left.

Later he made a comment to the family how I have a lighter in my shop and hes worried ime doing drugs. My one aunt will believe anything you say, so she was concerned as well. He continued to try to accuse me of doing drugs because I spend a lot of time out there. I by no means am perfect but never in my life have I done drugs and never will I. 

I was civil and tried to explain theres probably a lighter maybe even three I don't know exactly. Theres more then one use for a lighter an chances are I lit a pilot light or something like that. Truth be told I really don't know what exactly I last used it for. I do know it wasn't used for drugs.

Were putting a lock on the shop door today. My uncles gonna hate it but I don't care. He has no need to be in there. He is welcome to come see his mom but he is not welcome in my shop for any reason.

Thanks for just letting me vent here. It always helps, especially when you guys give advice.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Chillylulu on January 12, 2014, 07:36:08 AM
It's too bad you need a lock to keep out family.  But you have to protect your stuff, and your sanity.

Your uncle accused you to deflect attention from himself, because he knew he was wrong and you busted him. A lighter = drugs?!? His logic is strained.

You're nicer than me, I would have set a couple of uncle traps.

Good luck.

Chilly
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Branson on January 12, 2014, 07:43:07 AM
The guy's a jerk.  The crap about you doing drugs because there's a lighter in your shop is a lame a$$ excuse to try to justify his petty snooping.
Make that  lock a strong one! 

Teach him better?  Confucius really did say, "Why carve on rotten wood?"

Your house, your shop, your rules.  If he can't honor the rules, maybe he doesn't need to come over -- even to visit his mother.  Not if he won't respect simple, honest, and reasonable rules.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on January 12, 2014, 07:53:51 AM
Your correct, its sad you have to lock stuff from your own family. I really don't think he would take anything as much as he is noisy and wants to start stuff.

The only reason I welcome him to our house is the fact I don't want to drive the family apart. I interact as little as possible with him.

Sadly he thinks its his moms house so he can come and go whenever he pleases. Along with do whatever he pleases.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Chillylulu on January 12, 2014, 08:20:45 AM
Your dad really needs to step up and support you.

Chilly

Good for him!  I'm glad he agrees to the lock.

Chilly
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on January 12, 2014, 08:39:49 AM
Your dad really needs to step up and support you.

Chilly

My dad does in his own way. He did defend me a lot, as soon as he found out. My uncle is always convenient to bring it up when my dad isn't around. My dad is one to not speak much, but when he does it means a lot. He has tried to talk it over with my uncle but its going no were. My uncle will just make a issue no matter what it is, he finds stuff to make issues of. My dad was originally all against a lock but now he sees my point.

My other aunt defended me as well. My mom was out at the time.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on January 18, 2014, 01:09:26 AM
 So we put a padlock on the shop door the other day. Uncle wasn't to fond of that, as what would I be hiding. I really don't care what he thinks about that thoe.
 
Me and my dad just really are at the end with my uncle. Its like sometimes he makes it harder then helps. Some of my other family is starting to see it but not nearly as much as we do.
 
Today he called my mom at work, she didn't answer. He called my dad and he was busy working also. He called me, and i answered. He said she has to go to the bathroom and that's just disgusting so hes not going to help with it. I said well ime at work an he asked well who's going to be home first, it can wait. Sadly he was serious about that. My dad called back but i was closer and he cant just leave whenever. I went home and helped. Ime sorry but its one of those things that I don't want to help with either but i will cause i love her. Its like not everything in life can be about you and what you want.
 
She then was hungry and it was about lunch time. Of course i had to fix food for her cause he wouldn't. I fixed lunch for her an he asked were his is. I couldn't respond, well i could but i don't wana start crap infront of my grandma. I just went up stairs for two minutes so i didnt totally freak out on him and i come back down and she was saying she likes the news beter after my uncle put his show on. Then he makes a joke how we should just put a padlock on the bathroom as well(referencing to the lock we put on the shop door) cause shele have to go.
 
Many things like those and others have demonstrated why he wont be watching her.
 
Its just been a big adjustment with her moving in. We use to come an go whenever and now we cant always do as we please. Its something that has to be done and is well worth it. In the mean time its just a little hard. We will do what needs to be done to make it work thoe.
 
I have been real lucky as my cousin has been letting me make up my own schedule for work an just come an go around when I need to watch my grandma. Ime also still using one of his company pickups. As good as it is I somewhat dislike it cause I feel like ime taking handouts or something. I don't want special treatment or whatever it may be called.
 
The aunt she lived with is helping a lot as well. Between the four of us we usually can be there 24. around the clock. There are times we ask my uncle to help or my other aunt. That don't work out thoe so we avoid that.
 
My parents are also just great. I couldn't ask for better parents. Through this as much as we struggle with other family I got my mom and dad. Me and my dad went out to dinner tonight while my mom watched grandma.
 
Starting next week we will have caregivers in the mornings and some afternoons. They will do breakfast, showers, an just keep her company. My aunt and dad arranged that and my uncle made a comment about taking away form money they can inherit.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Batz on January 18, 2014, 01:54:19 AM
Your doing it a bit tough mate.

I wish I could shake your hand and buy you a beer, in Australia that would mean I care.

Batz

Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Plyerman on January 18, 2014, 01:51:24 PM
That's a tough situation you're in Nola but I'm proud of the way you are dealing with it.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on January 20, 2014, 07:52:37 AM
Thanks plyerman and Batz, I appreciate it.

Ime sitting here with her now and shes watching some home shopping network. Good thing she doesn't have a credit card, lol.

Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: lazyassforge on January 20, 2014, 09:35:48 AM
Nolatoolguy,

I admire your dedication to your Grandmother and to your Mom and Dad! As far as dealing with your uncle, You are a much better man than I am afraid I would be in a simular situation! God bless you! Prarers sent up for you and your family!

Bill D.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on March 18, 2014, 11:14:42 AM
Hey guys.
 
I figured I would do a quik little update cause I have nothing better to do.
 
I am not working as much anymore, actually I barely work. My days pretty much consists of cooking and cleaning up after grandma(both big accomplishments cause neither I did before LOL) . I then have to constantly watch her in terms of making sure she doesn't wonder off. About a half hour ago she was going to see the neighbors to say hi. At 4 this morning she woke up and was going to bake a cake for her sons 9th birthday. The neighbors don't live there anymore and her kids are all grown.
 
Its bitter sweet cause I will be moving out within the month. I have a friend who as a extra room at their apartment and will help with rent. I have already talked to my cousin about getting my job back full time. The numbers are tight, but they work. In other worlds I wont be able to buy extra wrenches. Hopefully ile pick up a few side jobs as well, like I use to do.
 
My uncles/aunts refuse to see there mom in a nursing home and they don't want to watch her. My dad has talked to them an made it clear and they don't get it. They are all quik to say Ile be there, then something always comes up. Its sort of funny how they told me there car wont start so they cant make it, then I see there tagged  on facebook at some restraunt with there kids. Or there sick, then there dog is sick(that's literally a excuse I got). Theres always something for all of them why they cant be here. One of them comes over for three hours a week and that's it. Oh an a few of the other grandkids came over once, but never again. The one told me “well I cant stand her so ime leaving”
 
It came down to me basically saying hey uncles/aunts ime moving out in a month so figure out what your going to do. They think ile back down, but I wont. Truth be told as much as I love my grandma I cant be a unpaid babysitter 12-18 hours a day, seven days a week. I only got so much money saved up, an school an car insurance, etc aint cheap. But its more then just the money part, its making me extremely bitter against my own family.
 
My parents have been great through everything, and I don't know how I would of done half of this without them. They truly have stood by me in there own ways. They both work two jobs, an do as much as they can when there home.
 
I go to school Tuesday and wednseday morning. I really enjoy it. I am finding it harder then I thought but I trually enjoy it. Luckily I only had to miss school once and my mom only had to leave work early twice for me to make school. Other then that the schedule works out were one is home.
 
That's about all for now.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: john k on March 18, 2014, 11:23:54 AM
This is tough, but what must be done is get your grandma into a nursing home.   I would say someone, your parents,  need power of attorney, liquidate her home to pay for her care.   It is almost past time for your other relatives to put up or shut up, but I think this can be done without their okay.   They will scream, but you haven't lost much there from the sounds of it.   Like I said, it will be tough, but she needs more care than any one family member can give.   Congratulations to you for sticking it out so long, not a lot of people would, and it says volumes about your personal strength.   
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on March 18, 2014, 11:33:51 AM
This is tough, but what must be done is get your grandma into a nursing home.   I would say someone, your parents,  need power of attorney, liquidate her home to pay for her care.   It is almost past time for your other relatives to put up or shut up, but I think this can be done without their okay.   They will scream, but you haven't lost much there from the sounds of it.   Like I said, it will be tough, but she needs more care than any one family member can give.   Congratulations to you for sticking it out so long, not a lot of people would, and it says volumes about your personal strength.   

Thanks john.

I totally agree. Sadly my aunt already has power of attorney, solely cause her husband is a lawyer.

I don't necessarily want to see her in a nursing home, but I know its probably best. I mean how much more long can we put off the inevitable.

Honestly its something I never thought I would do. I agreed for a day cause no one else could and then who knows what happened. It has taught me a lot about myself and what ime capable of. I think its one of those things that helps make me who I am.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: skipskip on March 18, 2014, 03:42:04 PM
Bless you brother, you are learning a whole bunch of life's lessons all at once and at a young age.

You are doing WAY better than most people at it.

A lot of us are proud of you here, and tho it doesn't seem like it, what you are doing and learning is making you a better person.

Keep at it, things will get better.

Skip
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Papaw on March 18, 2014, 05:58:17 PM
We have known you as a stand-up guy since we first met you years ago!
You are learning some deep life lessons now that will serve you well in your future. So many young folks don't even try to get involved with their elders when times are tough physically or financially.

Don't let them keep you from going to school.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on March 19, 2014, 01:52:38 AM
Thanks guys. I think I got more an better friends on tooltalk then I do in real life, LOL.

I just read back a little in this thread. Its sorta interesting to see how far its come.

I sure will get school done, an get my certificate in welding. Of all things its going to get done an get done with a good grade.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Branson on March 19, 2014, 05:47:58 AM
You're sure living through some rough times.  And you're holding up honorably.  What's obvious is that grandma has to have 24 hour supervision every day, not just for her general health, but for her safety.  Whatever the rest of the relatives say, there are two options, a nursing home or a full time home health aide.   It's ridiculous to expect you to give up this time of your life, when you are preparing, getting an education and getting experience for your future, just so they can know she's living at home.  They want that?  They can pay for it or they can take up the responsibility.

Your grandma would want to see you prepare to make a good living -- you know that, and so do the rest of us here.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on April 26, 2014, 02:24:43 PM
Well guys I have some good news and some bad news.

Pretty much the grant program that partially funded my schooling is being shut down next semester. Pretty much their funding got cut. Disappointing but hey it helped get some credits. I am going to take a semester or a year or whatever off to save money. Welding is what I want to do so I will go back to learning it. I just gotta take some time off but it wont stop me long term.

I moved into a apartment with my best friend. Its different but good. I think my friend still wants to kill me from getting the kitchen counter dirty. I brought in a toolbox to go through and set it on the counter. I didn’t realize all the dirt an grime until after lol. Counter came clean but some weird napkin holder thing didn’t. But all seriousness its working out good.

I bought a 2000 Chevy C3500 pickup, almost two months ago. It’s a regular cab long bed diesel 4x4. It has 260,000 miles but not the original engine or transmission. It was owned by a surveying company and well taken care of. Looking at it you would not think it has that many miles.
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Branson on April 27, 2014, 05:21:35 AM
> but it wont stop me long term

You can't lose with this attitude.  Good on you!
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: oldtools on April 27, 2014, 01:51:57 PM
You got a good start on life...  Keep it up!!
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Chillylulu on April 30, 2014, 03:38:52 PM
Try to get on welding somewhere.  Our company pays for work related education.

I know we have a sister company in your area. I can check on whether they need someone, and see how close they are.  Getting into a good trade can help too. Our sprinklerfitters local reimburses for passing grades in welding. Except in the city, the local is the same as the one here in Denver! Some get discouraged by the 5 year apprenticeship,  but it goes by quick. Illinois journeyman pipefitter is over $30 / hr + the benefits are really good.  A lot more $ in Chicago local, but I wouldn't want to work there.  Too many bad stories.

Chilly
 
Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: Nolatoolguy on May 01, 2014, 07:02:46 AM
Thanks guys.

At first it was very frustrating but I realized its not going to put me down. It may set me back a for a semester but wont stop me.

I do little tack welding at work but its mainly fitting pieces. Working again full time is good. Got a few side jobs going as well so that's good.

I will send you a message shortly chilly.

Title: Re: Just need to vent
Post by: bear_man on June 17, 2014, 01:14:12 AM
I too am dealing with two family members who I characterize as "vultures."  This is about/for things that I own as well as family heirlooms.  Me, I've come to see that being "brutally honest" about such attitudes and so on is the best way to go.  In the US, it's considered "calling a spade a spade" and nevermind the euphemisms. 
     As to the "vulture" aspect, I attribute that to feelings/beliefs that derive from insecurity.  To me, letting those things slide helps no one, while being "brutally honest" at least gets such things out on the table where everyone can chew on them in-depth and honestly.  "Real women don't sweat; they perspire at worst."  REALLY?  Is there a REAL, meaningful difference there?  I say no, unless it's a fantasy one wants to get others to believe in.  One strains one's self and sweats.  Period.  The persperation thingy is fantasy, to me.  Feel free to color me "weird."   *he grins*  Oh, and hang in there.  At least you're actually THINKING about all this, in addition to "venting."